Dreaming of Quiche

I have had this insatiable craving to gaze longingly at pictures and recipes of quiche lately. I'm hesitant and quakey at the idea of actually trying to make one, but the pictures of them just look so, so, so good. So I just thrill myself with a handful of Raisinets and a couple hours of perusing food blogs with pictures and recipes of other people's quiches. Lorraine, asparagus, broccoli, even cheeseburger... they all melt my butter.  I am an equal-opportunity quiche admirer.

Today I took my last dose of estradiol and dexamethasone (i.e., hormone supplement and steroid). If my ovaries were a high school football team, the meds I take each cycle would loosely be characterized: Clomid as the coach, estradiol as the cheerleaders, and dexamethasone as the parent coalition. The Clomid tells the ovaries to make the eggs, the estradiol supports the development, and the dexamethasone (the steroid) keeps everyone from acting up.

Anyway, at this point I feel like I would do anything for a baby. I would even like to just borrow one for awhile. The hormones are running high, and I have a bad case of the baby-gimmes.

We now have a scheduled date for our safety inspection of our house. We are doing our best to jump back into the process of getting approved to adopt, and that is the second to last step.  The final step is the home study.

This whole adoption journey has been complicated.  It's a practical, time-consuming, and emotional journey all rolled into one. We went through a phase in the last four months or so where we both got pretty overwhelmed by it all and just needed to stick our heads in the sand for a while. After all, this isn't like buying a goldfish.  This is an eternal, human life we're considering incorporating into our household for the long-haul, and training, teaching, and discipling for the glory of God. That, and ultimately we have the same issues as every human being on the face of the earth.  We are subject to fear and selfishness.

We debated for a while whether or not we were pursuing adoption to please God or to try and circumvent His plan and fulfill our desires for a child ourselves. We want a family so badly, and we wanted to be careful that we weren't rushing forward by our own purposes and designs like Abraham and Sarah did with Hagar. We want to trust God with our family, and sometimes it gets a little confusing trying to tell which direction he wants us to go.

So, we took a break. And, I had my surgery.  I decided that it would be good to make sure that I am healthy before we deliberately take on more responsibility. It would be one thing if God had just gone, "BAM! Baby!" and I got pregnant the way I was- obviously He knows best and would have sustained me through it. It's another thing to initiate a child's arrival ourselves while in a condition that's not conducive to being the best mommy I can be.

The break was also nice because we went through a very stressful period where well-meaning friends and family members suggested different scenarios where a baby might be available for adopting or need a home. I know that each time my friend/family member's heart was in the right place, but each time was such an emotional roller coaster. This happened three times, and by the time January was on its way out I was exhausted. I even went through a phase where my heart cried out, "God, if You decide to miraculously cause us to conceive a baby, fine. But I'm really okay with just my husband and my cat."

Thankfully I have pulled through, and am firmly on the other side of those sentiments. I once again feel emotionally secure and capable of survivng the process and cherishing children of my own. The desperation and impatience isn't eating me alive anymore.

I know some may wonder if it's wise to jump back into pursuing adoption while we are trying to conceive naturally as well. I wonder that, too. I also know that the more avenues I am pursuing the less anxious and obsessed I feel about each particular one. Having both options open clears the air, and helps me feel secure that it is going to happen. And not pursuing both avenues leaves me feeling sad.  I have a very strong feeling that God wants to build our family in both ways, and I am excited to see what he is going to do.

Back After Another Hiatus

I just realized it has been an incredibly long time since I have posted anything! Again!

 So, to update, the adoption stuff is on hold. We still want to, but we decided to take few months and see if we can have a baby naturally. In the meantime, Trinket is getting plenty of cuddles.

Also, we decided to move forward in finding Zenzi a new home. We knew we would have to do it eventually, since she never met a child she didn't want to test her teeth on. It's been one month since we said goodbye, and I have gotten several updates from her foster mommy that she is doing really, really well. She loves having other Keeshonds to play with, and her sleeping arrangement has been upgraded to being in bed all night with her beloved peoples.

Another major change around here is that I had weight loss surgery last December. I have lost about 60 pounds so far! This is another reason why we wanted to give pregnancy a shot. Of course, we don't believe in doing anything to prevent a pregnancy, I just use that language to signify our using fertility meds. Today was the beginning of my second round of Clomid. I am also going in less than a week for a hysterosalpingogram, which is a test to make sure that my Fallopian tubes are clear, and don't have some kind of blockage preventing pregnancy. We are praying that everything is clear and that this round is successful. They checked out my ovaries yesterday to make sure everything looked good before starting this round of Clomid, and it all looked great. This is the first time in two years that I am completely cyst-free!

The biggest thing lately has just been an onslaught of illness- David came home Monday with a violent stomach bug, and promptly shared it with me. It has been a little miserable around here the last three days. This is also the week that our church is doing VBS, and I am supposed to be helping. I made it Monday and today, but I'm not sure if I will be going back. Puking on the kids would be a bad thing, I think.

We also just got back in town from Louisiana- we were there over the weekend for an Above Rubies retreat/ family camp. We met several new friends, and were so encouraged gathering together with like-minded believers.

That's about all I can come up with at the moment. Prayers for wellness and a bouncing bundle are appreciated always!

Happenings

Well, it's been an exciting two weeks.   I have been doing a lot over the last couple of weeks, and no time or energy to sit down and write about everything.  I've been doing a lot of visiting lately, and enjoying it greatly.  My cats have been thrilled to have company over!  Also, a couple weeks ago the mentoring program started at my church as part of the women's ministry, and I have been getting to know my mentor, Anne.  It's just amazing to me how good the Lord is, and how well He provides.  I love Anne dearly, and I have been learning alot from her.  But mostly, it feels like my feminine heart is finally flourishing-- it's like I finally feel okay with being a woman.  Which is kind of weird, because it's not like I thought I was a man or anything of the sort.

At the luncheon to mark the beginning of this year's mentorship, I also learned about something incredible- Peppermint Tea.  It is the most delicious thing I have tasted in a long, long time.  A couple of days later I went by the store and bought a box of it to enjoy at home.  David and I have started drinking it at night when we read together.  Although there was a new development a few days ago- we made our tea as usual, then gathered up our books and Trinket, and retired to the bedroom to read.  While David was reading, it was a monumental task trying to keep my little furry friend out of delicious warm drink.  No matter where I put her or my mug, she just about had her head in it.  Finally, I drank it down to a couple of drops left, and offered her a taste.  I was thinking that as soon as she tasted it, she would be put off.  Boy, was I wrong! She lapped it right up and then tried to raid David's mug for seconds.

Another thing that I have been doing lately is a new Bible study with Anne.  She has been going to a small Bible study for a while, and she invited me to go with her last Friday.  It's a neat group led by a lady who worked as a missionary to the Jewish community for over 40 years.  Each week they study part of a manuscript written by a messianic Jew (who the lady taught years ago and converted).  I greatly enjoyed it because of the richness of meaning gained from the writer's experience with Jewish culture and fluency in Hebrew.  It seemed to me that the Old Testament came alive in a way that it never has before.

Today I got together with another dear friend from church, and we baked pumpkin goods all morning, then ate lunch together.  We initially intended to watch a John Piper dvd, but we got busy talking about things and time ran away from us.  I wasn't too disappointed, though, because I think that sometimes talking about personal things with a supportive and Godly friend can be as spiritually nurturing as attending a sermon.  We weren't deeply in the word, but I still felt like we ministered to one another.  We each made a pumpkin pie, and then we also made some pumpkin scones (yum!)  David is going to be so spoiled for dinner tonight....

Yesterday was also a good day- I spent a couple hours yesterday with another friend from church and her little children- she has two girls and a baby boy. We took a nice, long walk around a nearby park, and got to talk a lot about all kinds of things.  I loved spending time with them because her children are so adorably well-spoken and say such funny things, and she herself is a great conversationalist and listener. She made homemade bread, and we made sandwiches with it for lunch.  It was So Good!! I hope she and I get together again soon and exchange recipes!

Monday was a great day because I had an appointment to go get a massage, as well as a chiropractic adjustment.  While I was at the office, I found out that the doctor wasn't in because his wife had given birth to their babies (they were expecting twins!).  I was pretty disappointed because my back was in pretty bad shape-- sore all over!  However, as I was getting my massage he came by to do a little paperwork, and I saw him when I was finished with my massage.  He mentioned that he had been out of the office for just under a week, and was dying to get back to work.  So, I asked him if he would like to pop my back, and he said yes!  God is GOOD! It turns out that I had several ribs out of place and almost every vertebrae needed to be adjusted. I was poppin' all over the place!  I went in for another treatment this morning and am now pretty much back to normal.

Another good thing I've been doing this week is exercising.  I have been on two bike rides this week! Woo hoo! I have really been enjoying the nice weather, and I have been really proud of myself for getting out and about.

Laundry Day

Today has been a big day for laundry at Chez B--. It's not been without two little shadows everywhere I turn, however.  I piled all the clean laundry on the bed, and took a shower to cool off, and this is what I came back to:

Caught, red-handed!

A close-up of the perp.  Naughty, Gizmo!

Her Response?

Cat Update

Guess who discovered a new hiding place last night?

When we first looked at this house, we predicted that Trinket would enjoy this spot.  We made it over two months before she discovered it.  She was hilarious.  She couldn't understand why we couldn't pet her when she sits on the edge like when she sits on the edge of the bed.

Gizmo is also doing good.  She seems like she has become fairly satisfied with our food choice for her as of late, but still has moments when she clearly is holding out for something from a can (tuna, anyone?).  Plus, even when she comes up and rubs your legs, if you try to pet her, she has an immediate duck-and-weave response.  Like she's thinking, "Ack! My head! My head will come off!"

It's All in a Hard Day's Work

Today I did several productive things.  First, we went to the vitamin store around the corner (oh how I looooove living in Garland instead of Lancaster....) and got the vitamins I was advised to get by my doctor (the special one).  I got Vitamin D, but I got the drops instead of the pills.  I felt that if it was in liquid form I might have an easier time absorbing it.  And, I got the calcium supplements as well.  Plus, for good measure I threw in a sublingual Vitamin B/ Folic Acid supplement.  They taste like cherry!

Then, we headed home. On the way, I spotted a garage sale sign, and we decided to drive by.  The third one on that particular street looked promising, so we got out to look.  David found a new lawn mower for 60 dollars! I got Kylie a pair of sparkly red sneakers for a dollar.

Then, we really headed home.  I got to work sorting books, toys, and teaching tools into a semblance of organization up in the girls' guest room, as well as choosing some to share with some of our friends at church who homeschool and have kids under the age of eight. Also, Mom and Dad came over and helped. Dad and David worked really hard moving book shelves up to the second story from the garage, and then hanging all the shelves and pictures in the guest room. At the beginning of today, the guest room was mostly empty, and here are some pictures after a full afternoon of work:

Mom hanging up some of the dress-up outfits.

The rest of the room, with not quite everything put away yet.

Notice the sleeping man... my dad worked Hard!!

The upstairs sitting area.  Where did the cats go you might ask?

Peekaboo! They found a cozy little corner to cuddle in.

Trinket: "Hey, I thought I had successfully ducked the papparazzi...."

My main man. ^.^

The entry, plus part of the dining area.

The view from the entry- love those arches!

I just love our new house. I picked out the colors on the walls, too (at least in the downstairs and the guest bedroom...)!  I like how they turned out. We have increased our living space by 250% by moving.  It's big enough that we each have lots of elbow room, but not so big that we could lose one another in it.  I feel like this house fits us better than anywhere else possibly could. Thank you, God, for our wonderful home! 

Good Discipline

Gizmo got a whoopin' today for the first time in a long while.

Normally, she is our little irascible,rag-tag, touch-me-not grouch.  However, she has gotten into the bad habit of doing things that she knows are wrong as a way of getting our attention.  For example, clawing our feet or jumping up onto counters that she knows are off-limits.  Then, whenever we get onto her, she is belligerant about complying, and none the happier for the chastisement.

Today, I had enough.  Obviously, giving her love and attention whenever she was being sweet-natured have not been enough to nip this in the bud.  My philosophy has been to just redirect, and re-enforce the desired behavior.  But, this strategy has not been enough to foster an attitude of contentment in this one little kitty.  Sometimes we don't just need rewards for good behavior- we need swift and unambiguous correction when we err.

So, today when she was in the midst of her discontent, and expressed it by racing through the house and churlishly leaping up onto the wet bar, I fussed at her to get off.  Her reaction was not immediate. So, I grabbed her, and gave her two sharp taps on the rump while saying, "No!"

There was an immediate shift.  She actually seemed penitent. I told her she was a good kitty.  Then she sweetly cuddled up next to me and contentedly went to sleep.

I think that animals are much like us, in that they also find it hard to be happy whenever there are no clear boundaries.  We all need to know that we are loved enough to be disciplined.

Gizmo feeling sleepy...

Undiscovered Genius

All this time we have been thinking that our little Trinket was *special*.  We thought that she had a wonderful personality, but wasn't exactly the brightest bulb in the box, so to speak.  Oh, have I been proven wrong.  About one week after moving into the new house, as we were sitting down to dinner, I noticed my cats strolling nonchalantly into the living room.  They were supposed to be put away in our master bathroom.  I figured, no problem, the door was probably just not latched, and a draft pulled it open.  We put them back in the bathroom, shut the door, and thought that was the end of it.  Lo and behold, who came wafting back through the living room five minutes later?  If you guessed the cats, you are correct.  And with a spirit of delight amongst themselves to boot.

So, we put them into the bathroom one at a time.  I figured that Gizmo was the culprit, seeing as how she is far more dexterous with her little paws than Trinket.  After David put Gizmo in the bathroom, we gave her five minutes, and nothing happened.  Then, I put Trinket into the bathroom.  15 seconds later, I saw a little black and white paw shoot out underneath the door, cup the edge of it, and pull it open. 

We decided to switch their living quarters since the bathroom door isn't dependable about latching.  We converted the coat closet on the first floor into a kitty condo, complete with lights, litter box, food, and a water bottle, with a table cloth on the floor to keep things sanitary.  The first two days they were peaceful, and content.  Now, for the last three days, I am greeted in the morning with ths sound of my little black and white cat trying to figure out how to twist the door knob.  That cat amazes me all the time!  I have decided that before now it wasn't that she lacked intellect, she was just training us to do everything for her and let her do whatever she wants.

Stranded

Has anyone else ever been held captive in their own bathroom due to a gregarious tuxedo-kitty bent on staying spread-eagled on the floor in the doorway, massaging the air with her paws?  Whoever thinks that a trip to the potty is a chance for alone time has obviously never tried to use the bathroom in my house.  And if you concede to the doorway hijacker, and give her sweetly fluffed belly a rub, it becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.  Just try to stop once you've started.  Give it two seconds, and you will hear a seductive, half-purred "Meh" come floating up from the floorboards.  Then, if you look down, she will wink at you.  With. one. eye.  Then, my friend, she has you forever- a hapless victim of her coy cuteness.

"Try to resist me. I dare you."

New House

We tentatively have a contract for our new house.  It's the same one as all along.  The sellers decided to be reasonable, and have even conceded a fridge.  ( We won't even go there as to what we conceded, now will we!)  And, because of the way the contract is written up, we have plenty of time (Lord willing... please, oh please God!) to sell  the house we have now. 

As always, the cats are super pumped about the coming change.

Kitchen Demolition

So far I have managed to check several things off of my to-do list for the house.  Today was the day.  You have no idea how stressed I was about the whole plumbing thing.  You see, the sink in the bathroom has never worked.  Or at least has never been in working condition.  Not since even before we moved into the house.  When we bought the house, we figured, "oh, no big deal, we'll just get a plumber in to fix it before the end of the month."  Well, the month stretched to the end of next month, which became the end of the year, and kept getting put off until five years later, and we are now wanting to move and only now getting around to fixing the stinkin' plumbing.

So, two days ago a plumber came over.  He strutted through the house, made several tsk-ing sounds and some snide remarks about my wonderful husband and father trying to figure out how to fix the plumbing themselves, and then said that his time and labor to fix the problem would be "hundreds of dollars".  So, my wonderful husband and father decided to go ahead and try to fix it themselves.

This effort included the help and presence of my mother, Shayce, and Kylie.  Kylie wanted to help, too.  And since Mom and Dad were supposed to be babysitting them, she got the chance.  Any time the door needed closing, she was Johnny-on-the-spot, with an exclamation of "I got it!"  And between times of closing an open door here and there she found the opportunity to divest ever shelf within reach of its items, turn the TV off and on a few hundred times, dump every board game we own out of its box, and chase Trinket a few laps around the house.  She also worked out a strategy of her very own for giving David's knees a squeeze and kiss about every ten minutes.  She was especially delighted whenever he would sit on the floor- this was in itself an open invitation for head-rubbing, ear kisses, and choke hugs around the neck from behind.  Plus, she kept tabs on where everyone was at all times- particularly me and David.  If either one of us stepped outside or into the bathroom, or pretty much anywhere out of sight, it would take long before we heard the pleading toddler siren song of "Oh Sitty [i.e. "Cristy"], where are  you?!?"  or "Oh! My David! Where my David GO?!?!?!?!!!!"

Shayce was alternately overjoyed to be at our house and in hysterics over the idea of us moving.  She has become quite attached to our cozy little home apparently.  At one point I had a quiet moment with her to talk about it, and she "I'm scared that if you move, you will move far far away and go live with the Indians!"  And no, our family is apparently not all that politically correct.

So, Dad and David got workin' on the plumbing.  Originally we thought that they would be going through the cabinet, so David and I cleared the cabinet out.  Then, they decided that they needed to tear the cabinets and counter away from the wall. So they did.  Three holes later, they decided that the worst part of the leak must be coming from behind the stove.  It was.  So, then it was time to go to Home Depot for our long list of needed supplies for pretty-fying my house.  Apparently picking out supplies at home depot takes longer than 30 minutes.  Two hours after arriving at Home Depot, the kids were both clawing at each other and wrestling to get out of the cart they had so delightedly picked out.  Dad and Mom were pretty much dead on their feet, and David and I were just getting around to picking out our paint color.  So, we let the kids down from the cart (bad idea- do not try at home....er, at the Home depot near you...) and within two minutes Kylie was hanging from a the bars on an industrial cart like a monkey.  Half a minute later, she was sprawled on the floor gathering her breath to scream.  All of this before I had a chance to tell her not to.  So, I scooped her up and she and I went out to the garden section, where I showed her how to jump in the puddles and splash.  That was the funnest part of the evening.  After a few minutes we went back inside, picked out a paint color, waited fifteen more minutes for them to try to get some butter out of it (joke...), and we were headed out to the car.

On the way home, we stopped at a little Hispanic grocery store, and got everyone a strawberry ice cream bar.  There's just something about Ice cream bars from Mexico that is sooooo good.  We went ahead and let the girls have theirs on the way out the door.  Then we got to the car and realized our mistake.  We decided to live dangerously and just strap them on into the car complete with ice cream bars and head on home.  How bad could it get, right?  When we got home, there wasn't any ice cream on the car seats, but both the girls had sugary, sticky hands and faces.  Kylie started freaking out after we got her out of the car over the stickiness.  So, I decided to just take them straight to the bathroom and let them eat their ice cream sitting in the tub. I didn't care if they bathed in it after they got back there, as long as it didn't get on the furniture, it was all good.  Both girls were delighted with the novelty of being in the tub with all their clothes still on!

Then it was time to cuddle on the couch with blankets, pop in a movie, and have some popcorn.  At least for me and the girls.  Dad and David got the honor of making another trip to Home Depot to take back the old parts that they had taken an hour and a half choosing in the first trip, and try to find different parts, since the first parts were too big.

An hour and half later, they came back home, took five minutes to try the new parts, discovered that they also would not work, and decided to call it a night.  David wanted to just call the jerky plumber back and let him fix it.

So.  Today was the day.  This morning we called the plumber, and left a message for him to call us back.  Then we called our realtor to discuss a contract, and while we were on the phone with him, he was like "Hey, if you need a plumber, I know just the guy!"  And inside, I was all "Yessss! Now I don't have to listen to the other guy's lip!"  So we called the new plumber, who was willing to come over right away, and then we called back the old plumber and told him thanks, but no thanks.

The new plumber was soooooooo nice.  And now we have a working sink in the bathroom.  And a lot of glue fumes.  But we have a working sink!  Yay!

Here are some pictures of our adventures:

Ice cream in the bathtub!

This is what my kitchen looked like once Dad and David had given up for the night.  They worked on it for over 10 hours.

Having their popcorn and watching Peter Pan- it was little intense.

After the nice plumber was finished.

David, being so happy that the plumbing is fixed!

Trinket would like everyone to know that she objects to the smell of glue.

Kitty Cat Television

There is no greater pleasure for my two cats than the priviledge of sitting and staring out an open window.  It dazzles their senses, especially their senses of sound and smell.  They pick up snatches of information with their ears and nose, and learn more about the world around them than I could from watching the television for a week.  They get so excited whenever David opens the window for them that they begin humming, purring, and prancing in circles.  Here are some pics:

 Gizmo just gets so excited that she has to be crazy for a couple minutes to vent some steam!