At the Moment

Blackberries in my house disappear almost as fast as if they'd been raptured. And David gets to feel the "left behind" sensation.

Our little Aquanaut is apparently dedicated to the aquatic life, because he has shown no sign of interest in joining us on land. I'm 40 weeks and 3 days pregnant. I will be SO, so glad when this is over.

And... Still Nothing.

Tomorrow is our due date, and still very little sign that this baby is ready to come out. We had our 40-week appointment today. Things are *sort of* progressing- I'm finally a tiny bit dilated and 90% effaced. I still have the feeling, though, that this little guy is just really comfortable and not quite ready to consider departure.

I've been having some bad acid reflux this evening, and a queasy day. For the last week and a half I've had a voracious appetite, where I felt like I just couldn't get enough to eat and my stomach would growl within 30 minutes of eating something. Today I haven't really felt like eating anything. David took me out after the doctor appointment to walk around the mall and have lunch, and I was sad because nothing sounded appealing. We got two of our very favorite things- fries from Chik-fil-A and a chicken salad croissant from La Madeleine- and I still only managed about 4 bites of each thing. (Plus, hooray for pay-day! It was nice to be able to *afford* for me to not eat our favorite things....)

While we were at La Madeleine, I was sitting at a little table waiting for David to order the food, and an elderly man walked up and wanted to know if he could join me. Weird, and interesting. I said "Sure", so he had a seat. His name is Bruce, and talking to him was a very interesting experience. He talked almost non-stop for about an hour to David and I. He mostly talked about how he was a "psychic" (not in the money-making way, though- just in the quirky way) and about his wife who had passed away a couple years ago. He was saying that he lived not far from the mall in a senior home, and because of the storm last night he had no power in his apartment to cook breakfast. Plus, he hadn't been out of the apartment since Sunday. I was pretty sad for him, and glad that we could give him some company for a while. He kind of reminded me of a slightly crazier version of my own dad- and if my dad was feeling lonely (and I couldn't be there for him) I would hope someone would spend time listening to his stories about picking out dishes with his wife and all.

Going to the mall also reminds me of my mom. It was one of my favorite places to take her in the last couple years of her life, and it seemed to make her day when we would go. She LOVED shopping, and she would usually say something along the lines of "Well thanks for bringing me. This is one of the few times I've gotten to leave the house lately." (Which was totally untrue by the way- I have never known anyone with more plans involving being out of the house as much as possible as my mother....) Northpark Mall in particular was a place I took her a few times- especially when my niece Shayce was a baby and my mom watched her every day. It's a very baby-friendly mall. One time we went and took Shayce to lunch at the mall. Mom wasn't sure what to get Shayce for lunch, so I got her a little bag of garlic bread bites with marinara sauce for dipping from the Italian place in the food court. We sat and nibbled at our own food, but mostly just watched Shayce and her love of "dipping"- she would dip her bread in the sauce, and then just lick the sauce off and repeat. I think Shayce was only a little over a year old then. It was a really fun day together. Both Shayce and Grammy were pretty much guaranteed to have a happy time if we were at the mall.

37 1/2 Weeks

We have 18 days left until our due date! The baby is getting really big- my entire abdomen moves when he kicks or rolls... During the day, especially the more I walk, he drifts down into my abdomen more; however, at night he takes full advantage of the lack of gravity pulling him down to wedge his way up to as close to my collar-bone as he can get! The last couple nights every time I turn over I have to cough- he's putting a lot of pressure on my diaphragm and lungs.

I am so, so happy that I have been able to carry him to full-term. I have been anxious for most of the pregnancy that something bad would happen, and God has covered us in grace. I can't wait to meet our little "aquanaut" (as his daddy likes to call him)!

Making His Presence Known

There's a little bottom and a little pair of feet that are hard at work making sure that I don't forget there's someone living inside of me.... He gets excited when I eat things (especially cold or sweet things), and that's when he starts stretching- his little feet poke out of my side, and his little bottom starts protruding out of the top of my stomach. It's uncomfortable and awesome at the same time.

I am at a stage in pregnancy where I have moments that I think I am about to perish for lack of food... after eating less than an hour before. Plus, my mouth has still been super, super sore. I have had to get by on soft foods today, many of which are not too high in protein, and thus not very satisfying for more than just a little while. I feel like I have been eating constantly today- applesauce, oatmeal, an egg here and there, mashed potatoes, etc. You can almost set a timer by my hunger pangs- they come pretty consistently about 30 minutes from the end of each snack.

The good news is that my doctor is no longer concerned about me losing weight. Today when they weighed me I had gained another 3 pounds (since 2 weeks ago). That puts me at a total loss of -12 pounds since getting pregnant. I really, really hope that I don't gain too much more.

36 Weeks!

Today was our 36-week appointment, and everything is looking great! The baby finally flipped into a head-down position almost 3 weeks ago, and is still there. He hasn't started to drop down yet, so who knows when he will decide to come- I'm hoping for sooner rather than later.

His timing on flipping around was pretty interesting. We ended up going for a consultation with the OB that I mentioned a couple months ago, who routinely delivers breech babies naturally. We weren't quite 34 weeks along at the time. He basically just answered our questions about it all, and said he would be happy to help us if we got to 38 weeks and the baby still hadn't flipped. That evening, we had one of our Bradley classes, and during the class we played around with different essential oils. I was especially drawn to the scent of Jasmine, and was sniffing it all evening. On the way home, I started having a bunch of Braxton-Hicks contractions, and they were somewhat uncomfortable. When we got home, I laid on the inversion table for about 30 minutes, and when I got off of it, I noticed that my stomach felt different, and I couldn't feel or find the baby's head anymore! I read later that jasmine aromatherapy actually stimulates the muscles of the uterus, and I think it made the Braxton-Hicks contractions stronger and helped the baby to finally turn around. Two days later we had our regular appointment with our current OB, and he confirmed that the baby had flipped, and was in a great position!

It has been such a relief to my poor, stress-addled brain for the baby to now be head-down. It's like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, and I can finally relax and enjoy my pregnancy again. Now it's just a countdown until he comes- yesterday was exactly one month until our due date.

Cravings

Lately I have been craving personal pan pizzas from Pizza Hut and fried eggs. You almost can't beat a good fried egg- I daydream about them.

However, I had an orthodontist appointment yesterday, and as a result, my teeth are so sore and sensitive today that they have declared an official strike. No pizzas for me at the moment :(

35 1/2 Weeks

This Friday I will be 36 weeks pregnant. Full term. I definitely feel that is an accomplishment!

I'm not so huge that I'm miserable yet. I definitely have moments where I feel full to the brim of baby. I have carried the baby somewhat "small" throughout the pregnancy. People are almost always surprised when I tell them how far along I am- which is nice. Overall, I have lost 18-20 pounds since I found out I was pregnant. I was up to -25 pounds a few weeks ago, but I gained a few back.

This past weekend we went on a "baby-moon". We took a roadtrip up to Missouri, and went to a marriage/family retreat and then visited friends in Kansas City. The travel time on each leg of the trip was extended quite a bit by me begging for a potty about every 30 minutes- and we were lucky and blessed that each time I really needed to stop there was a place to do so!

The retreat we went to was a Family Camp for Above Rubies- a wonderful pro-family, pro-life, Christian organization (www.aboverubies.org). I have been getting their magazine for about 3 or 4 years now, and I love it. I have met so many neat people and wonderful friends through their family camps and women's retreats, and I love getting a chance to hear Mr. and Mrs. Campbell speak.  The retreat this weekend was such a breath of fresh air for David and me. It felt like while we were there we could just forget about the stresses and just be together, and be encouraged.

And, of course, our time in KC was wonderful. It didn't last nearly long enough! We got to see some dear friends and have some great barbecue. The family we stayed with while we were there are particularly special to us. They have a little daughter with a genetic disorder, and their testimony and faith through parenting her, plus their church's wonderful website, articles, and statement of faith, are what brought me to a true, saving faith in Christ. They were also very significant in David's journey as well. Studying together after encountering such a different view of God and the gospel changed our marriage as well. We love to take advantage of every opportunity we get to visit them!

Now that we're back home, we are burrowing in for the last stretch of pregnancy and "nesting". I have a long list of things to do before the baby comes, plus a very important nap regimen to resume! I didn't get my nap yesterday- we were traveling all day long, and for whatever reason, laying my seat back in the car would kick off a series of painful Braxton-Hicks contractions after a few minutes. No rest for the weary that day! Instead, we listened to some interesting talks on CD by Doug Phillips (www.visionforum.com), specifically, the series on "Mysteries of the Ancient World". I escpecially loved the talk about the Incas- I found it very relevant to our current culture. But I am very glad to be home now, where I can just lay down and go to sleep without worrying about impending pain and doom, lol. One of my big things to get done now is to organize the baby's things and get his clothes and blankets washed. I have a ways to go in getting things set up like I want them! Plus it will soon be time to pack our hospital bag....

Happy Anniversary

to my parents! I've been thinking about my Mom a lot lately. Time has not made things much easier.

An Update

In one sense, a lot has been going on. In another sense, nothing has been going on.

Some moments I feel like I want to cherish these last few weeks before our baby comes bustling into our world and changes our family dynamic forever. The very next moment I wish I could just blink and it all be over NOW, and be able to finally just look back on this time period with a sigh of relief that we made it, and it's all okay.

Baby is still (as far as I can tell) hanging out in breech position. We were 31 weeks along yesterday. Many people have told me that some babies stay breech until the last possible minute, then turn within a week/day/hour/minute of delivery. I am hoping that for my peace of mind this isn't one of those babies. I hope he decides to go ahead and turn sooner rather than later. I have been really stressed about it all. Baby has been so far unimpressed with all methods of persuading him to turn. He has his own mind and timetable, thank you very much!

One of the nice things lately, though, is all the support and encouragement I have received from friends. Two of my wonderful friends have been over to visit in the last week, and I was really blessed and uplifted getting to see them.

I got to go get my first pregnancy massage yesterday, and it was so, SO wonderful. The best part was that our health insurance covered it completely! Our budget has been pretty strained for the last three months or so, so I haven't really indulged in too much pampering. Our house flooded over New Year's while we were out of town, and so we had the whole house repainted, patched, and had new flooring put in. And we got new living room furniture. We spent 44 nights in a hotel. And of course, as is the situation with allllll house projects, things did not go or turn out exactly to my liking. Plus my pregnancy hormones and emotions were in complete overdrive. I feel like crying and destroying a pillow over the littlest things. We still have to settle out the final payment with the painting contractor, and I seriously hope that I do not have to see his face. I spent an entire afternoon crying over our new couches- they don't look like the same shade inside our house as they did in the store. It's tragic. (at least it was to me, in the moment.)

All that to say that we are tight on money, and I am very glad to have good insurance so I can still get an occasional pregnancy massage- something that is a definite benefit and blessing, that I am not entitled to at all. So many women go through pregnancy with so much harder circumstances!

We have another doctor appointment with our current OB this coming Thursday (the 21st). We are going to wait until after this sonogram to go for a consult with another OB- I'm pretty sure we are going to switch doctors, I just wanted to get the sono first and see how/what the baby is doing. I'm also hoping to get a 3d face shot of the baby :)   At this point I am feeling like I need to find an OB who is willing to attempt a breech delivery naturally just in case the baby doesn't decide to turn. (But I definitely want to have an OB as opposed to a midwife just in case for whatever reason I *need* a C-section).

It's Been A While

I'm now 28 weeks pregnant. Friday will be 29. And I swear, this little guy moves CONSTANTLY. He is almost never still. Unless, of course, David puts his hand on my stomach to feel him. Then he is perfectly still.

Things have been going so-so. I had my 28-week appointment, with an ultrasound, last Thursday. They told me the baby is breech, and the doctor made a joke about how if he doesn't turn we will be using the Scalpel method instead of the Bradley method. I was fine until about a day later, and then I FREAKED. Of course, all the while assuring all my facebook friends that I was just fine and not worried at all. On Sunday night I stressed myself out about it so much that I had a contraction. And it was so PAINFUL.

So, I've been working on relaxing more. Also, I've been trying to prepare myself for how this might turn out if he doesn't turn and get in a good, head-down position. Today I contacted a chiropractor who is trained in the Webster technique, which is supposed to help align things and make it easier for baby to get in the correct position. Hopefully they will call me tomorrow and I can make an appointment. Also, I talked to a wonderful lady today about being my doula. She is going to come to my house to interview with us a week from tomorrow. She reassured me that the baby has plenty of time still, and if he doesn't flip then she knows a good doctor who is willing to deliver breech babies. I really hope this baby decides to cooperate, because this back-up plan doctor is about an hour away. But trust me, I WILL be driving an hour if it means I could avoid a C-section.

David's parents came to visit for the ultrasound last Thursday. We had a great time, and I was super glad that they came. While they were here we introduced them to Greek food. We went to a Mediterrranean buffet for lunch on Thursday, and then that night I cooked chicken gyros at home. I was in the midst of a serious, serious craving for gyros. I'm over it now, but it was delicious while it lasted.